On Leaving Babies in Cars (For a "Quick Errand")

I'm not talking about the accidental forgetting of children in cars (see terrifying Washington Post article). I'm talking about, if I am picking up food at Layla's Falafel that I know is ready, and the baby is asleep in his carseat, can I just leave him there for three minutes, rather than haul him out and me have to fend off people who are going to get all up in his face to try to get a peek?
I am so paranoid about my baby that I wouldn't leave him in the car, but I believe people do this quite commonly. A couple months ago on Greenwich Ave, a woman left her 4 week old in the car to do an errand at a bank. When she came out, someone had called 911 (which you HAVE to do, because you don't know if the person forgot their kid or not) and the cops were already there. She said she could see the car the whole time, but they arrested her.

When is it OK to leave a kid in the car for just a few minutes? I doubt the law says, "Parents may leave a child in a car as long as they can see it from the window of the store, and as long as their errand does not take longer than ten minutes."
My husband says, When the kid is old enough to let himself out in an emergency, it's OK. I don't agree. I think they need to be like, 11. Or as old as it takes for them to have common sense not to break something in the car, or let a stranger steal them, or to accidentally put the car in drive.
I suppose the situation falls under the area of neglect and endangerment, but that's pretty subjective. I want to know, can you leave your baby in the car or not? Or, like most things, is it OK as long as you don't get caught?

OK, I found the law:
"An act concerning the penalty for leaving a child unsupervised in a place of public accommodation or motor vehicle.
(a) Any parent, guardian or person having custody or control, or providing supervision, of any child under the age of twelve years knowingly leaves such child unsupervised in a place for a period of time that presents a vehicle for a period of time that presents a substantial risk to the child's health or safety, shall be guilty of a Class A misdemeanor...
(c) Any parent, guardian or person having custody or control, or providing supervision, of any child under the age of twelve years knowingly leaves such child unsupervised in place of public accommodation or motor vehicle between the hours of eight o'clock p.m. and six o'clock a.m. for a period of time that presents a substantial risk to the child's health or safety, shall be guilty of a Class C felony."

See, it's subjective. Is three minutes alone in a cool, locked car a "substantial risk to the child's health or safety?" I say no. I think the woman on Greenwich Ave basically just left her kid alone for too long, long enough for people to notice and worry. So, she messed up, but you can see how she could easily think she had done no wrong.

I'd never leave my baby alone in the car, because here's how I think: "What if someone ran into my car with my baby in it, and he was trapped? I'd want to be trapped WITH him. Or, what if I fainted in the store, and no one knew I had a baby in the car? What if there is an explosion in the store and I'm knocked out? My baby could overheat in the car." I mean, weirder things have happened, right?

By the way, the Washington Post article is worth a read, but it's really, really depressing. Between 15 and 25 kids die each year when their caregivers accidentally leave them in the car. The biggest thing I got from the article was a) when you are tired and busy, your memory can short circuit and b) to avoid that, leave your purse in the backseat by the carseat so you won't forget your kid. A sleeping kid is a quiet kid, and a busy parent who is not used to taking the kid to daycare might forget he/she has the kid in the car and just go right to work. The article profiles a couple of these devastated people and describes how the scenario can easily happen to a tired, distracted person. Click here to read more.

Pops in the Park: Is Alcohol Allowed?

Since I went to college in Virginia (and beach week in South Carolina), lived in New York for a year, and have now lived in CT for almost 10 years, I can't quite keep track of alcohol laws. I know I can buy liquor in New York on Sundays, but can I bring a bottle of wine to the Pops in the Park concert tonight in downtown Stamford? I am not a huge public drinker, so I don't know public alcohol laws. Can I bring it as long as it's like, in a paper bag?
I'm not actually planning on bringing a bottle of wine- if you are toting around a baby, you need to be sober- but I just want to know, so I can encourage the people I'm with to have some fun.

And like, if I can bring wine to the Pops in the Park, why can't I bring it to Alive @ Five? Because they have beer/wine tents there? I don't think they have beer/wine tents at Pops. Really, all this alcohol stuff is confusing. It changes for every state and every event. I do know about the open container in cars law. You can't do that. (WHY would you do that, anyway? Driving and alcohol just aren't a good mix.)
Click here to read more.

Best Baby Store in Stamford: Bed Bath Beyond

I'm really psyched about Bed Bath and Beyond carrying so much quality baby gear- now I can get the super-safe Britax carseat I want at 20% off since I can use the ubiquitous BBB coupons- but boy would BBB have come in handy oh, about 6 months ago when we started shopping for baby gear!
It would have saved me
a) a couple hellish trips to White Plains/Hartsdale, where Buy Buy Baby and Babies R Us are, and
b) 20% off of my babyseat and strollers. Yeah, I said strollers. You'll see when you have a baby. This wall, which looks really scary to you now, will look like a candy store when you were a child.

I hit the baby section at BBB yesterday and I was impressed. It takes up the entire back section of the store.

Here's a list of cool stuff they have that I have, love, and/or want: all the kickass strollers (city mini jogger, bugaboo cameleon, you name it they have it), Bebe au Lait nursing covers, the ERGObaby carrier (so much better than the Bjorn once the baby can hold his own head up), Swaddleme swaddles (don't get the fleece, too hot- get cotton), Halo sleep sacks, and hideously ugly but useful baby swings. They've got high chairs, pack and plays, medicine, bath stuff, baby-proofing safety stuff... everything except clothing, and there's not much in the way of crib sheets.*

I WILL say, although all this baby stuff is 20% off, it's still worth a trip to Giggle on Greenwich Ave because you cannot beat Giggle's customer service. With all the money you save at BBB, you can afford to splurge on some of Giggle's more unusual items (like a round bath tub baby can sit up in, fun sheets, and cool mobiles).

Here's a pic of the Bebe au Lait nursing covers; BBB has the best selection in the area! I own two because they are so awesome. Just be careful not to get the double fabric one (with eyelets) if you are going to be using it in the summer; it's hot enough under that cover even when you have the single layer!

*You should order crib sheets online from Babies R Us, or hit Giggle in Greenwich for some spectacular ones that cost twice as much but that I find worth it since it has such a prominent place in the nursery. My nursery was basically planned around some orange striped sheets from Giggle, much like the only thing I cared about for my wedding 2 years ago was that I had orange roses. Oh, and go next door to Carter's for adorable, comfortable, affordable baby clothes.
Click here to read more.

ANOTHER Bank Robbery? SERIOUSLY!

What the heck?!? I wrote a post last week that I didn't have time to perfect and post last week titled "Avoid Banks in Fairfield County." I wrote it because a Bank on High Ridge was robbed- one that had just been robbed 4 months ago! I stated that since I now tote a baby everywhere, there is no way in heinieho that I am ever going to a bank again.

Well, big shocker, on Monday there was another bank robbery on Summer St. I'm sorry, something is wrong with this town.

And do these banks not seem really easy to rob?

I have an $800 check I need to cash, but now I'm hesitant to go into a bank to cash it. BOTH of my Stamford banks (a credit union and a People's) were robbed a couple years ago, so I don't think I'm being that paranoid. And the guy who robbed my People's... TRIED to rob my credit union before he went to People's! Geez Louise.

Previous Stamford Talk bank posts:

--September 13, 2007-- My People's Bank Got Robbed!!!
--September 15, 2007-- Wrong Side of the Metro North Tracks? Bank Gossip
--October 5, 2007-- Bank Robbers- Not Just in Stamford! Click here to read more.

Good News for Parents: Baby Gear at Bed Bath 'n Beyond

Sure, Target's got some decent stuff (my favorite of which I won't tell you, so I can be sure they'll always be in stock for me), but it's nice to have another option. From what my friend who went today reports, they have way more stuff than Target. For example, they have the excellent Kiddapotamus Swaddlemes. I forget what else she said they have- she was in a rush but saw more than the usual pacifiers, bottles, diaper bags, diapers, wipes. It sounded pretty comprehensive. In any case, it HAS to be better than the HORRIBLE baby section at the Toys 'R Us in Norwalk.

Speaking of babies, mine's crying. Gotta run. Let me know what cool stuff BBB has if you get a chance to go!
Click here to read more.

Alive @ Five: How Was It?!?

If you went, please let me know what you thought of Alive @ Five! I'm dying to hear reports of how it went. Initial info:
1. Advocate article says "hundreds" of people showed up... I expected thousands. Was it crowded, or did the cover charge decrease the crowds?
2. One of my twitter friends said the event was sketchier as the night got later, with lots of guys of the butt-grabbing variety. (So typical.)
3. Stamford Notes has a few photos up.
4. On a bad note, an Advocate article reports that cops somehow managed to mangle the face of the (female) owner of the Palms in a botched arrest (for driving her car without a license and then resisting arrest). That's a shame, first obviously for the woman, and second because it suggests Stamford Police are having trouble handling crowds at the event. We'll have to see what further articles report.

It's a weird story- evidently the cop asked her to move her car from the lot behind the Palms, because they wanted to close it because people were cutting through, the the same cop asked her for her license (who takes their purse with them just to move their car? NO ONE!) and then he tried to arrest her for driving without a license. She got angry, then witnesses say the cop punched her. The accompanying photo shows an enormous swollen spot on her face.

I hope the rest of the concert was not chaotic like that! Click here to read more.

Competing Farmers Markets on Wednesday? I Do Not Approve.

What the heck? I heard from a friend, and saw on Stamford 411, that there is a new farmer's market outdoors at the High Ridge shopping center on Wednesdays. Um, isn't that the same day the Bartlett Arboretum holds theirs? So essentially, this second farmer's market is cutting into the Bartlett's biz. Why would people drive the few miles to the Bartlett when they can just swing in, get a latte at Starbucks, browse some books at Border's, and buy some fruits and veggies, all in one stop? I am CONFUSED. Who is running this rogue farmer's market? (Addition 6/26: The city is! See this Advocate article. Even though High Ridge is way more convenient than the Bartlett, I still think the city is stealing the Bartlett's thunder!)

My friend said there were not many veggies at the Bartlett Market this week because the farmer who sold veggies there last year was banned because not enough of his food was grown in CT. But she said there were strawberries, and bread, and that the market is on the lawn at the Bartlett rather than in the parking lot. The Bartlett, a few miles north of the Merritt, is a beautiful setting. You may recall that hilarity ensued last year at the Bartlett's Farmers Market when a naughty dog ran off with a pie.

I'm wondering if this High Ridge market allows that farmer. If so, he must feel pretty happy about taking biz from the Bartlett. I could be totally wrong on this. We'll see. I'm just suspicious of this new market.

Check out some nice photos of the market on Stamford 411.

Posts about the Bartlett:
July 9, 2008-- Bartlett's Farmers' Market: Bumpy Start
And see my photos of the market, including the naughty dog, on flickr!
Click here to read more.

Alive @ Five Starts Tonight... With Food Court!

Correction: the post I based this on was on my RSS reader but no longer on Napa's blog- whoopsie. I'll still leave this up, but Chris Preovolos of Lunch Break Chronicles tells me Napa's not doing the Alive @ Five food court. Ah well, you'll have to go to the actual resto!
Two things I gleaned from Napa and Co's blog:

1. There is now a food court (reeeeeeeally? but why? Don't they want people in the restos?) at Alive @ Five. I wonder how this is going to work out. Will lines be super long? Stamford Notes, the new Stamford blogger, will have to report, because she told me she'll be there. I don't have plans to go... yet.
Anyway, Napa is serving Chef Taibe's Grass Fed Beef Tacos and Jose's Chicken Legs at Alive @ Five. According to SDSSD's event calendar, food court will include fare from: BUtterfield 8, Carvel Ice Cream, EOS Greek Cuisine, Maui Wowi Hawaaian, napa & co., Rack ‘N’ Roll, Remo’s Brick Oven Pizza and Sundance Café & Bakery. Awesome!

2. Lower Summer St. (by Mary Ann's and the movie theatre) is CLOSED to traffic. That's new, right? I thought you used to be able to go right down Summer... maybe not, and I always got there early enough not to worry about it!

You should really be looking at the Napa and Co. blog once in a while. They have great info about their special events, and they are really doing a good job of keeping up with the blog so far. Click here to read more.

Scandalous Bat Mitzvah, Stamford Advocate Blogs

I totally see this letter writer's point. Although I found the tawdry details of the "bat mitzvah gone awry" hilarious, it would be nice to have positive community events, such as the Mill River Playground anniversary, also covered and photographed in the paper. But,
a) does he think the Advocate has dozens of photographers to send all over town? Hello, budget cuts!
b) this is why you start your own blog; so you can cover what YOU are interested in.
Oh, and
c) this is another great reason for the Advocate to have their own blogs. There is just not enough official newspaper space for everything, so it's nice that the Advocate has started a few blogs of their own.
I don't have time to figure out how many blogs they have exactly, but the main one is Stamford 411 and it's definitely worth reading. The journalists and photographers (actually, the photographers have their own blog, In Sight) have a huge window onto life in Stamford, and the more we hear from them, the better.

Scroll down on the main Stamford 411 to see other staff blogs listed on the right. Click here to read more.

Feeling Unpopular? Have a Baby.

Are you feeling neglected and unpopular? Seriously, have a baby. It will restore your faith in FC humanity. Now, maybe I'm just a particularly cute and charming looking mother, but I- I mean, my baby- get so many loving, admiring glances while we're out. I "wear" him a lot in his sling, so maybe people think he's brand new or something. Really, the sling is so no one can get near him and breathe on him. Plus, I love to have his warm little body close.
In any case, people are ridiculously nice to us. Yesterday in Super Stop and Shop, I was wearing him in his Bjorn (far inferior in comfort to the Moby wrap, but easier to put on), and bending over to take items out of my cart. It was pretty cumbersome. A nice old lady must have thought I was going to drop Baby Q on his head, because she insisted on unloading my cart for me.
The checkout lady and the grocery bagger both smiled and cooed at me- I mean, my baby- and were really sweet, saying hi to us- I mean, him, and asking us- I mean, him- how old we were. (Almost 3 months!)
People, including me, are just suckers for babies. It's really sweet. You have to wonder why we can't be nicer to each other, if we are able to be so lovely with babies!

One of the nice things about a baby is that it forces you to slow down. A trip to the mall and grocery store takes twice as long, because at some point, you have to change a diaper or two (in the car) or feed the baby (which I also do in the car because mine has comfy seats). You just can't rush putting a baby in and out of a carseat, or unloading groceries while wearing a baby. You just have to accept that you are slow as a turtle, and that feels really good to me. It's like I'm living in the South again!

Now, the flip side of being that popular is that if you ARE in a hurry, you have to beat people off with sticks to keep them from talking to you and wanting to look at your baby and asking you how old he is and, of course, telling you to "enjoy every minute." Everyone says that to me. I'd say it's annoying, but it's actually a helpful reminder! Click here to read more.

Local Celebs for Whom I'm on the Lookout

This snippet from the Greenwich Time's gossip column made me think about what celebs I need to be keeping a better eye out for: Pound Ridge, N.Y., residents and actors Richard Gere and Carrie Lowell were seen at the Avon Theatre in Stamford on March 31.

I've started a list of local celebs:
Regis Philbin
Gene Wilder
Stephanie Seymour
Tom Bergeron of Dancing With the Stars

Who else should I be looking out for in the Greenwich/Stamford area... besides the visiting celebs who always go to Napa and Co? Click here to read more.

Jazz Outdoors at Stamford Mall: I'll Take It!

I'm glad to see Stamford Town Center making the most of their outdoor space. Here's info on the jazz, which runs from June 17 to Aug. 12. Too bad the outdoor dining looks out on a traffic circle (for valet) and Tresser Blvd., but it will still be good people watching and good music. The food... well, I can't say any of the mall places (PF Cheng's, Mitchell's Fish Market, Capital Grille) are my favorites, but I've been known to eat at them! Looks like the mall will be a good place for Wednesday happy hour, and the press release actually mentions that the Fairfield County Happy Hour Club will attend the inaugural jazz event next Wednesday. I like those people, so maybe I'll try to go.
About those much maligned mall restos:

Mitchell's Fish Market was our first outing with baby because booths are perfect for breastfeeding AND stashing the baby's carseat if he happens to fall asleep. We wanted a slightly fancier booth place because it was our two year wedding anniversary.

Capital Grille- ate there once and will not go back if I have the option to do Morton's instead. The meat was OK, but house salad SUCKED (sorry to use that word, but I feel very strongly about salads) compared to Morton's chopped salad. Morton's is just cool, and Capital Grille is just OK.

PF Chang's- We sometimes go here if we go to Barnes and Noble. I really like their crab wontons with a glass of white wine! However, for your Asian food of choice, you should do Thai Chi, formerly Plateau- better quality food, and they deliver! Click here to read more.

Oaklawn Sidewalks; And, You Should Fear Me

Stamford resident Cynthia Reeder has written up a great document about why Oaklawn Ave- a horrifyingly busy cut-through between Newfield Ave and High Ridge- needs sidewalks. Please take a look at the petition if you ever drive on Oaklawn. Then, if you want to sign the petition, email Cynthia at ckreeder@mindspring.com or call her at 602-9997. You can also swing by Beldotti's Bakery or Grunberger's Jewelry; they both have a copy, and Liz Sue Bagels might as well. The petition asks for concrete rather than crappy asphalt, and it states, “A multi-phase plan, cost analysis, and timeline are needed to prioritize the most dangerous sections and to ensure that the project is completed and funded.”

I have to say, even with sidewalks, I’d be a little scared to walk on Oaklawn. I’d be afraid a car would take a curve too fast and run off the road and onto the sidewalk. I don’t think these are just crazy-new-mom fears, either. I myself have been known to exceed the speed limit on Oaklawn, say, when a certain someone is screaming his head off in the backseat. And other drivers, often in SUVs, often take curves too fast and veer into my lane.

Another Newfield area road that could use sidewalks, badly, is Turner Rd. People go so fast on that road, I want to kill them all. Now, that IS new-mom-violence talking. (Other moms, my new increased violent urges are normal, right, a protective thing?) I could walk to the grocery store if that road had sidewalks. I suppose I could also walk down to Oaklawn if it gets sidewalks, but I repeat my fears about people driving so poorly that they’d kill me- actually, they can kill me, it’s really my baby I’m worried about. I’d rather him not be motherless, but I’d sacrifice myself- and all of you, too- for him, in an instant.

Other moms, it’s normal to lie awake at night and imagine who you’d kill if it meant your baby could survive? Right? I’ve determined that I could kill most adults, but not children. So, if a crazy killer or hostage taker made me choose, I would shoot YOU, but not your CHILDREN. Probably.

OK actually, I’d kill pretty much anyone. Click here to read more.